We’ve all been there with the parent or relative who is convinced his/her son, daughter, niece, nephew, cousin will want their furniture, artwork or other keepsake after they are gone—even if they have never asked them or brought up the subject. As a friend of mine put it, “it’s like they want others to love their stuff.”
Okay, he might have used another word.
Still, the attachment to these types of items—I call it stickiness—really keeps people from being free of clutter. It’s a little frustrating because many of these clients can get rid of or donate items for the initial round where they don’t feel much of an attachment. It’s when we clear out some space the stickiness comes into play with those “keepsakes.” And that’s when a couple of disturbing trends occur.
- An interest in storage bins and containers to manage remaining items
- No conscious effort to slow down the inflow of items coming into the household.
The second one becomes really troubling as it doesn’t take all that long for clutter to build. That’s why, at the very least, you need to adopt a “one in, one out” approach to your household. If better organization and storage will do the trick, you know you’re headed back to where you started.
So, what do you about stickiness? How do you part with items that contain memories that are so precious you can’t bear the thought of not having the actual item?
Well, when your hands are sticky, you wash them, right? The equivalent of that in decluttering is going directly to the sources: ask relatives or loved ones if they would like your precious items, either now or after you’re gone. Then make a decision based on that response:
- If the answer is yes, give it to them now or in the near future so you get to witness their enjoyment.
- If the answer is no, take a digital photo and store the memory on a thumbnail drive or in the cloud. Then, donate it.
If an item means that much to a client, I will tell them to keep it. Somehow when you realize relatives don’t have the room or want the item, it makes it easier to part with.
Does this resonate with you or anybody you know? If so, call me at 508-246-6120 or drop a line.